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The thoroughbred horse is the epitome of the self-absorbed, over-indulged professional athlete, a four-legged fulfillment of the me-first mentality that is bringing about the bastardization of our great nation.
F**k you, Secretariat.
No old-timey carriage horse in the neighborhood should be considered safe, witnesses warn.
OMAHA, Neb. — Sam Clemens, the dude who earlier this month survived a life-threatening hangover, this afternoon smoked “a shit ton of bud” while watching the final few episodes of season three of Lost and is now “so starving” that he could “eat a horse.
“Seriously.”
Miami: Awash in controversy.
MIAMI, Okla. — A local watering hole’s most recent idea for an edgy, religious-themed party has turned this sleepy Midwestern town into a powder keg of Christian controversy. Read the rest of this entry »
Def Jam hopes holiday-based song releases will help R & B artist Jeremih continue to top charts.
Jeremih: Birthday Sexsessful
HTC missed the boat by making the standard ringer for its "Hero" something other than Enrique Iglesias' eponymous song.
Today I spent over an hour on the phone, talking to the fine folks in tech support at Sprint and HTC. I was a man on a mission, and with good reason. Unfair overages, you guess? A stolen phone?
No, I was dealing with a phone fate far worse: ringer problems.
The application on my phone that’s supposed to let me specialize ringers has gone haywire. And with it, so has a small part of my soul.
You see, I’m a serial ringer specializer. It’s a habit that, in a convoluted way, helps me organize my life.
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- Ed Hardy T-shirt: BOLD, and only $140
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- Hardee’s Thickburger: BOLD, and only 1,400 calories
In an apparent effort to ensure that even plus-size douchebags can dress the part, two companies considered unlikely bedfellows — Ed Hardy and Hardee’s — have announced the launch of a joint venture, Ed Hardee’s.
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- Why not open your home to Scruffles?
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- … after all, you would for Gwyneth Paltrow.
Johnny Weir: alleged ladies' man.
VANCOUVER — Johnny Weir came up just short of winning a medal last week in the Olympic men’s figure skating competition, but if rumors circulating around the Olympic Village are true, Weir has bagged an even more impressive prize during his stay in Vancouver.
Recent college graduate checks into sex rehab facility. “Not cool,” friends say.
Charlie "Wilt" Clack, alleged sexaggerator.
LAWRENCE, KAN. — In what sources close to the situation have speculated is just another lame, albeit very elaborate, attempt to convince his buddies that he pulls a lot of ass, Charlie “Wilt” Clack has checked himself into sex rehab.
In TheFacebook.commentary, we tackle the tough issues facing users of the world’s foremost social networking site, the URL formerly known as TheFacebook.com. The pressing issue investigated in this installment: Doppelganger Week.
I'll take Bruce Vilanch for the reminder of my below-average looks.
Recently on TheFacebook.com, people have taken to replacing pictures of themselves with pictures of celebrities to whom they bear some marginal — or, in most cases, imagined — resemblance. This doppelganger idea is a dangerous one, because it seems to be deluding people into thinking they’re better looking than they actually are.
Charlie Boston
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